A Single Hope

I have come to realization that the golden rule of life, to treat people the same way you would like to treated, is simply the best rule to follow throughout the rest of your life if you take this into consideration because all in all, it's ultimately the best way to go.  How many times have you experience some sort of injustice and pondered, 'Hey, that's not how I would like to be treated!' but not truly confronting and resolving it thus creating the viscous chain reaction of doing it to other people, some you actually like and care about?  We all like to think we know that what goes around, comes around and that karma is the justice of it all but what happens if you just do the right thing from the start?  To just channel the good that is in capable of us all and take that into consideration each and every interaction we face with one another?  Sadly, but true, this isn't the case.  As humans, we weren't made to be perfect.  Whatever it is that's holding us back, whether it'd be immaturity, low self-esteem, prejudice, or upbringings, or whatever it may be, it doesn't come that easy.  We individually have to realize this on our own.

I'm hoping it'll come sooner than later to some because they go through life with a closed mind and heart, which is extremely dangerous to the soul, and not achieving the full potential of what it is to just be. To be at the moment, to experience reality at it's purest form, to bestow time as it is and not the enemy, that God, or whomever you want him or her to be, never judging and just wants you to be----who you are, who you can be, and who you will become---this is what it's all about.

One can only hope.

Bloody Mary

Here's a stab at a short story by me.  

It was a Friday night and Micah wanted to go to happy hour with his best friend Jeremy.  Happy Hour at Baja Betty's was always a fun time with decor of frazzled abstract paintings of disfigured cubes that represented humans having a good time at the beach, at a club, and at Baja Betty's.  Micah wonders who the artist was to create such poetic representations of bar life, always colorful yet tinted a bit of ambiguity.  He ordered himself a margarita and a corona for Jeremy to start off the Happy Hour with his brand new credit card.

"Would you like to start a tab?" asked Tiger, the bearish bartender.

"Why, yes, I would love to start a tab" said Micah, who felt all grown-up now that's he's 21 and living on his own.  His friend Jeremy thanked him for the beer.  The two exchanged comical observations of the crowd, half lit by the low light that made them all so flawlessly beautiful.  

"Look at her there with the two gentlemen in suits.  You think they're gay?"  asked Jeremy.

"If they are, that's their hag" exclaimed Micah.  The hag looked drunk and desperate of love, nothing those two can ever give her.  It's a shame because she was beautiful but she liked the company of gay men.  Maybe she liked gay men because she felt secured that they'd never hurt her.  It seemed they liked her for the same reason.  Whatever the reason, they all liked each other's company.

"Look at that handsome brute of a man over there," pointed Micah to a man who was definitely his type.  A tall, dirty blond haired middle aged man in his thirties who had a charming smile was telling a story to his friends.  

"And I almost slapped the bitch!!" said the handsome man.

"Ugh, another queen.  All of a sudden, he's not so brute anymore" said Micah, disappointingly.

"Until they talk..." said Jeremy.

The two continued to drink their happy juice until it was half empty and decided to chug it down in one to get another.  Happy Hour was about to end in 30 minutes.  

"Tiger, babe.  We'll get another round.  But this time, I'll have a long island iced tea and..." said Micah as he turned to Jeremy to ask him what he wanted.  

"Another corona please" said Jeremy.

"Sure thing boys," answered Tiger with a wink.

Micah and Jeremy decided to go out to the patio to have a smoke.

As the two were huffing and puffing on a half-lit cigarette, an older man in a wheelchair wheeled into the patio to join them.  

"Hello boys, how are you in this fine evening?" asked the older man.

"Great, thanks and how are you today, sir?" asked Micah.

"Don't call me sir!  I'm still young!  60 years young.  In fact, today's my 60th birthday," said the older man.

"Well happy birthday," greeted the two young gentlemen.

"Well well well...if it isn't Harry the magnificent.  How are you today?" asked Tiger, as he stepped outside to have a smoke.

"I'd be super if I had a bloody mary!" exclaimed Harry.

Tiger rolled his eyes and put out his cigarette on the ashtray.  

"One bloody mary coming up," said Tiger as he made his way back into the bar.

"You know boys, when I was your age, we didn't have this," explained Harry.

"Have what?" questioned Jeremy.

"This!  This bar, this 'happy hour', this acceptance of homosexuals!  You boys definitely have it easier than I ever did."

Micah and Jeremy just looked at each other with a smirk of amusement.

"I was in the Vietnam War and back then, you'd have to be in war to prove you're a man.  Now?  You boys just sit around and smoke your cancer sticks, drink your 'martinis' with your pinkies up and everyone can care less what you do in bed with each other," barked Harry.

"On no Harry, we aren't together.  We're just best friends," explained Micah.

"Ooohhhh really?  Well I wish I had a best friend who was gay to accompany me on my birthday," said Harry.  "Where's my goddamn bloody mary?!" 

A moment later, Tiger came out with Harry's bloody mary as he explained to everyone that is was last call for alcohol.  Micah asked for his tab.

"You boys enjoy your youth because it won't be there forever," exclaimed Harry as the two best friends excused themselves to go home.

"What a sad old man," whispered Jeremy to Micah on the way out of the bar.  "I hope I never be that bitter."

"Hey be nice.  That may be us in 40 years," said Micah.

The following afternoon, Micah stumbled upon his receipt from Baja Betty's laying on his nightstand.  The tab looked higher than he expected so he called the bar to find out what was ordered.

"Well, it looks like you ordered two coronas, one margarita, one long island iced tea, and one bloody mary."

Micah just smiled at what took place.

"Happy 60th Birthday, Harry."

Another year older, another year wiser.

Happy 28th Birthday to me.  And it was a memorable one.  

Starting off on Monday.  My co-workers gave me and Abby a potluck for our birthdays since I'm on the 9th and she's on the 10th.  They brought chips, cookies, salads, pizzas, and sweet treats.  Debbie made tiramisu and her famous layer dip and it was both delicious.  I thanked everyone for contributing to our potluck.

On February 9th, Duane made breakfast for us and it was pretty good.  It was a Mexican omelette with a strip of bacon and a jalapeno toast with cream cheese.  He forgets that I'm not a big fan of jalapeno but he is but it was still delicious none-the-less.  Then I got ready for school and was a little later than usual.  It was hard to find a good parking spot.  I ended up finding one farther than I usually would like but was cursed by a bro of a tool in the process.  I take full responsibility for my idiot move of u-turning and not realizing that there was still a car behind me, the bro who yelled out "fuck you brah!  fuck you!" as he honked in utter rage.  That guy needs to see an anger management shrink cause it wasn't really that of a big deal and there wasn't an accident so he needs to chill the fuck out.  I laughed hysterically as I walked to my first class.

Humanities and Music are my subjects this semester and it's all lecture.  Pretty boring but interesting at the same time.

Came home to Duane and he was ready to take me out to the science museum in Balboa Park.  My sister gave me a groupon to the science museum for my birthday, along with wine tasting as well, and with the science museum groupon, we were able to watch Hubble IMAX for $4.50 a pop.  The documentary was breathtaking.  I got a bit emotional a couple of times because of the beauty and complexity of the universe is all so mind-bogglingly amazing that I can't even fathom how big our universe really is.  IT'S HUGE and it reinforces me that my little problems in my minute life doesn't even compare to the vastness of our expanding universe.  And to know that our Earth is so unique and so special yet we take advantage of it every day is a little depressing.  That's why I will try to be a little greener for the sake of saving our precious jewel of a home.

Duane and I had World Curry for lunch and it was delicious.  Then we hiked down Sunset Cliffs to take a couple of photos but we didn't stay long because we were pretty tired.  We got home and took a nap.  

Met up with a couple of good friends for a night of drinking and crashed pretty early because we had Big Bear to look forward to the following day.  

And here we are in our Big Bear Lakefront Lodge hotel room waiting for noon so we can do a little snowboarding.  The weather here is beautiful, the sun is shining, it's about 45 degrees with a slight ting of cold in the atmosphere and couldn't ask for a better way to spend my birthday weekend with my handsome significant other, Duane, who was able to make this happen.  Thanks babe! 

2010, I hardly knew ye

Well, 2010 didn't really bring me the "success" I envisioned last year (in terms of writing and being inspired) but it did give me a couple of units I need in order to achieve success.  From taking two classes at a time per semester (6 units total), at the rate I'm going, I'll be a pharmacist in about 8 years.  I'm praying it'll be sooner.  By me working full-time and going to school part-time, with rugby on the weekends and Duane in between, my life is going to be just this.  If I didn't had that mental breakdown after high school, I'd probably be a pharmacist by now.  But I can't live in regrets.  That'll only hold me back.  I have to look forward to 2011.  Cause 2012 is supposedly going to be the end of the world.  Not that I believe it or anything, but it's a good motivation factor---to achieve as much as I can in the next two years or poof! Fini.

2010 came and went so fast that I can't even recap on what happened each month.  I turned 27, I got the iPad, I finally scored a try in a real rugby game in which I initiated the Zulu warrior and ran my naked ass across the field amongst strangers and not-so strangers, Duane and I took a vacation on the coast of California to luscious Eugene, Oregan where we spent a week with his mother Pam and step-dad, Dave, went back to school and got straight A's, saving as much as a I can for an ultimate vacation in Australia, and now writing a blog on what I want to expect in 2011 at 6AM in the morning.  I have to do a turn around shift today (worked last night, work again at 9am) because we are attending a poker party at Dan Munch's house in Santee.  Why am I up you ask?  Cause I kept dreaming of work.  Work work work, school, rugby, and Duane - my life.

I'm not complaining about my life.  I actually love it.  But I just seemed uninspired lately.  I need a muse.  I need something that'll lead me to a focus point of just wanting to read as much as I can and write.  Maybe I'll take a writing class during the summer to umpft my motivation. 

With that said, I will now list you my 2011 New Year's Resolutions:

1. Get ripped!  Now that I bought P90x, I want to finally have the six-pack that I've been craving for the past two years of working out.

2. Writing more.  Seriously, one short story.

3. Love Duane more.

4. Save.

5. Get a MacBook Pro.

6. Find a job that pays more.

7. Get straight A's.

It seems to me I'm always wanting MORE.  My greatest goal to ever achieve in life is looking at the things that I have and just be.

The End of A Beautiful Friendship

I lost a friend today.  He didn't die but our relationship did.  And it was over a stupid text argument about him not keeping his word and me expecting an apology but getting nothing more than an excuse that he fell asleep, thus not keeping up to his word.  I'm the type of person that respects you if you commit to your word.  If you don't, my respect for you over time will eventually diminish.  All I was expecting was an apology, to man up to his flakiness and this could have been just a rustle in the wind.  But he didn't.  And to his defense, cussed me out that the weekend is the only time for him to catch some sleep and that was the reason why he flaked out.  Well, then you should have told me that rather than to leave your best friend hanging all night.  So I denounced our friendship, claiming that I'm done with him.  And at this point, I am.  I'm tired of trying and trying to be a good friend and being shot down at my relentlessness.  So I'm done.  I'm done trying.  I'm not going to try any more to befriend a person who disrespects me to a point where I'm blogging about it.  I don't usually burn bridges but this time, I've striked the match.  I'm sure this isn't final but at this moment in my mind and time, it's pretty much over.  I'm done with him, I'm done with his immaturity, I'm done giving my all to a person who obviosly doesn't care about our friendship enough to apologize when has wronged.  That is all I was asking for was an apology.  Yet, his pride overpowered our friendship.